Extension Extension

 

Eavesdropping on a raucous group of folks telling stories at the adjacent table in a restaurant.

“I’ve got one,” offered a woman between sips, “I had this friend visit me when I was living in L.A. She was kind of naive.”

“By ‘naive’ are you foreshadowing?” asked another woman, almost slurring her words.

“I’ll tell you, if you can shut your piehole,” admonished the storyteller amidst the laughter of their dinner party. “She wanted to go to Beverly Hills. I hated going there, so she went by herself. While there, she got extensions for her hair because she thought this was a hip thing to do.“

“And this is worthy of a tale?” chided the tipsy heckler.

“Finish your drink,” continued the woman, bringing down her middle finger. “She was naive because she got into a car with a good-looking guy who offered to show her the classic view from Mulholland.”

“Alright, now I’m in,” snorted the inebriated friend. “What happened? Did she wind up another statistic?”

“As soon as he drove away, he reached over and grabbed her by the hair. Those extensions slipped off like a lizard’s tail and she rolled out the door with only a few bruises and scrapes.”

“So she extended her life by extending her hair?” table-pounding laughter exploded.

2019

Illustration by Mar Startari, 2019

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